The past couple weeks have definitely been the hardest emotionally, not just for me and Hilary, but also for Marissa.  She continues to cry for Lauren, telling us how much she misses her.  She has moments of where is she becomes very quiet and withdrawn.  She has also been reluctant to go to school (pre-school).  But it's tough to know how much to push her into going.  While It's important, it is just preschool.  How far can she fall behind?  Besides she'll still be in pre-school next year.  But a good sign (I think), is Marissa is slowly beginning to raid Lauren's stuff.  To her credit, she'll look up towards heaven and ask "Lauren, is it okay if I take this?"  She'll wait a few seconds and then say, "What?  What did you say?  What?".  I'll then have to say, "It's okay.  She said it's ok".  Marissa also gets sad when there is no clouds in the sky.   The other day when we were driving to Starbucks, she said "there is no clouds in the sky.  Where is Lauren?"  I said, "maybe she went on a trip".  Marissa responded, "to China?"  For some reason, she says that is her favorite country.  Even though she has never been there and is also not Chinese.   But then again, she thinks she can speak Mexican (not Spanish).  I said, "Yes.  To China.".  Marissa:  "but is she is over China, how can she watch over us?"  Me: "ummm."  

-  We still haven't found an urn yet.  A few people have given us some suggestions and ideas.  We have a design in mind.  Sleeping Beauty on a bed.  Now we just have find it.  Not sure if we can have one custom made.  I'll check Disney the next we go (if we can ever bring ourselves to go there again).